Script - Just a Cup of Coffee

I was asked the other day for a script submission for an anthology from Jim Main (Main Enterprises), so I wrote this one up... Idea popped in my head on Sunday night and I wrote it on Monday. It got the stamp of approval, but not for the originally intended anthology. This is too, um... vulgar for the original intended anthology. Oops! It should appear at some point in the SATYR Anthology. Roger Wilbanks might be doing the art on this one... If he says yes anyway. :P

Enjoy and be warned... there are cuss words... Oh my GOD!

PAGE ONE (Three Panels)

Panel 1. Group of six guys sitting around a poker table. Scattered around beneath their cards and chips are bottles of various sorts (hard liquor) and cans of cheep beer plus blue prints for a bank of some sort with areas circled in red marker, such as the vault, paths to the vault, spots where a security guard stands, etc… All of the men look like they need a shower and a shave and are a couple of drinks past being able to stumble home effectively. Our protagonist, Jamie, is facing us, cards held up so no one can see them, looking across at the dealer with a poker face, at least as great a poker face as someone as drunk as he is can manage. He’s in his mid-thirties, mousy brown hair, scruffy growth of beard that would look fine if he had bothered to shave the scruff beneath his neck, too. He’s wearing layers of clothes to protect himself from the chill of the room, a flannel shirt buttoned up, wind breaker over that, and a thick worker coat over that (looks similar to a flannel shirt, but thicker and has padding beneath). The others are dressed similarly, but each looks a different shade of desperation. Pauly is to Jamie’s right and Kent is to his left on the panel. Of the others, we only see their hands and cards. Across from Jaime, the hands are holding a full house.

Caption:
You ever have one of those days? Last night was no biggie, hangin’ out with the boys, playin’ cards, an’ shootin’ the breeze. Just like a ton of other times.

Panel 2. Angled shot so we see Jamie’s face from the side, proud of himself as he puts two pair down on the table, confident he’s won the hand. Around the table, except for Carlos, sitting across from him, everyone is ticked, and throwing their hands down on the table. Carlos, on the other hand, looks proud of himself.

JAMIE:
Read ‘em and weep, fellas!

Caption:
Me an’ the boys, we had this bright idea. Let’s help plan the perfect heist. Got the blue prints, cased the joint, yadda yadda yadda. Perfect in every way, so we decided to celebrate.

Panel 3. Carlos, smirk on his face, slams down his full house and we see Jamie’s face, cursing at the loss.

CARLOS:
Not so fast, Jamie-boy. Pony up!

JAMIE:
You a card shark in your last life, Carlos?

CARLOS:
No, I just got the touch, man.

JAMIE:
Uh huh…

CARLOS:
Who gives a shit, man, we’ll be rollin’ in it tomorrow, anyway.

CAPTION:
Actually, none of us gave a shit, but goin’ home broke wasn’t the best way to end the night.

PAGE TWO (Five Panels)

Panel 1. Jamie stumbling down the street, walking with Pauly and Kent, all in the same state, laughing and holding cans of beer.

KENT (singing):
If I was a rich man, rich man, very very rich…

CAPTION:
Pauly, Kent, an’ me, we went way back. Well, we used to kick the crap outta Kent, but when he gave Pauly a shiner one day, we decided he was all right.

Panel 2. The three of them further down the street, Jamie facing a wall, peeing, blocked by Pauly and Kent, who are facing us, watching for cops.

CAPTION:
We watched out for each other. When Pauly got wind of this gig, he told that douche-bag Carlos to bring us in.

Panel 3. Jamie walking towards us, peace sign held up towards his friends, who are trailing behind him.

JAMIE:
Later boys!

PAULY:
2 o’clock, Jamie, don’t forget.

JAMIE:
You’re gonna call me three times before then, Pauly, how can I forget?

CAPTION:
When was it, 2, 3 in the morning? Hell, I didn’t care, Candie was probably dead to the world anyway.

Panel 4. Jamie walking away from us, stumbling one way.

CAPTION:
Man, I was piss drunk.

Panel 5. Jamie walking away from us, stumbling another way.

CAPTION:
I was real pissed. Shoulda stopped a six pack ago. Heh, didn’t care, though… usually didn’t.

PAGE THREE (Five Panels)

Panel 1. Jamie, whistling, messing with the key to his front door, view from the side. House doesn’t look too bad from this angle, just a bit small. Above and beyond him, we see a metro track of some sort, nothing running at the moment.

Panel 2. Jamie stumbling towards us, door closed now. He’s fumbling in the dark with his jacket, dropping it on the ground.

Panel 3. View from the corner of the bed, Candie’s side, looking towards the door as Jamie comes in the room. He’s wearing just his boxers and socks, large polka dots on his white boxers. He has a couple of prison tattoos, one on his upper arm, a serpent of some sort and one on his right pec, a skull with a knife through it. Candie’s face is visible turned towards us (not visible to him), eyes open, face looking enraged. She’s pretty despite the rage.

CAPTION:
Seein’ Candie layin’ there had me thinkin’ maybe I could do right by her for once. Maybe this would be the score.

Panel 4. View from the opposite corner of the bed looking towards Candie and Jamie. Jamie is getting into bed, a slight grin on his face, reaching towards his wife.

CANDIE:
Don’t even think about it, you drunk prick.

JAMIE:
I wasn’t gonna do nothin’.

CANDIE:
Uh huh… Well, you keep your friend to yourself, James, get your ass to sleep and sober up.

CAPTION:
Always hated it when she called me that. Next time, I figured I’d be quieter, stealth-like.

Panel 5. Jamie on his back, hands under his head looking up at us, eyes open, the grin still on his face.

CAPTION:
As I went to sleep last night, I had dollar signs goin’ through my head. Dollar signs an’ the look on Candie’s face when I brought it home.

Panel 6. Similar view, but Jamie turned slightly, drool coming out of his face, sheets messed up, looking like he’s been sleeping for hours. Light is coming in through the blinds slightly.

CAPTION:
Oh the dreams last night… Always loved my wife and, you know, had lots of good dreams about her. She was a stripper once, ya know? Used to tips. Well, I got a big one comin’, Candie, I thought.

PAGE FOUR (Six Panels)

Panel 1. View of the metro tracks close to the house, everything vibrating from the noise as the train pounds over the tracks.

SFX:
CHOOMCHOOMCHOOMCHOOM!!!

CAPTION:
You ever get one of those headaches when you wake up a little hung over an’ don’t need nothin’ but a cut of coffee?

Panel 2. View of Jamie’s face, lying against the bed looking towards us. Beyond him we can see light from outside the window shining in. His eyes are bloodshot, his face needs a shave, he most definitely has a hangover.

JAMIE:
Shit.

CAPTION:
God, this is one of those days if Candie was here she’d let me have it.

Panel 3. Jamie getting out of bed. The opposite side has been straightened and Candie is long gone.

CAPTION:
Why did you have to buy the damned house by the tracks? Fifty fuckin’ k, Candie, that’s why!

Panel 4. Jamie, wearing clothes similar to the day before, but a sweat jacket with a hood somewhere in the layers, too, stumbling down the cramped hallway, lit cigarette in one hand, wadded up empty wrapper from some generic cigarettes dropping from his other hand onto the ground.

CAPTION:
All I could think of was just how much I wanted a damn cup of coffee.

Panel 5. Jamie walking into the small kitchen. We see a coffee pot in the center of the counter with a pale yellow post it note on it, writing too small to see from here. Immediately to the left of Jamie is a small table with a pile of bills on it, “PAST DUE”, “FINAL NOTICE”, etc…

CAPTION:
Don’t need no frapawhatsitsfuck, just black. Throw in some grains, I don’t care, just gimme the damned coffee.

Panel 6. Hand lifting up the empty coffee pot with a post it on it that reads in pretty woman’s writing, “Get more coffee if you can get off your lazy ass long enough to do it.”

JAMIE (OP):
Shit again…

CAPTION:
She had a talent, you know, for writin’ stuff in that pretty scrawl that was just plain fuckin’ mean... So much for that.

PAGE FIVE (Five Panels)

Panel 1. Jamie walking towards us down the sidewalk tossing the last of his cigarette on the ground nonchalantly. His hood is up and smoke is coming out of his mouth from the cigarette and the cold.

CAPTION:
Figured I’d just head to the store, grab some cigs, some coffee, and a candy bar. That’ll do me, I thought.

Panel 2. Jamie standing at the counter in a 7-11 type store. A short Hispanic man is helping him but handing his credit card back to him. A pile of candy bars, pack of generic cigarettes and a steaming cup of coffee are sitting in front of him on the counter. Jamie looks disgusted and the Hispanic man looks apologetic.

CLERK:
Sorry man, your card was declined.

JAMIE:
Hold on a sec, I’ve got some --

CAPTION:
Then I remembered the night before.

Panel 3. View from Jamie’s POV looking across the poker table at Carlos as he hoards his winnings from their final hand last night.

CAPTION:
God damned Carlos, that snake.

Panel 4. Clerk pulling the goods towards him like Carlos pulled the money towards him in the previous panel.

CLERK:
Sorry, sir, I’m going to have to ask you to leave.

CAPTION:
What was he gonna do, stop me from taking a fuckin’ cup of coffee?

Panel 5. View from behind Jamie, his hand in the back of his pants pulling out a pistol, yelling at the clerk and pointing with his other hand.

JAMIE (yelling):
You’re sorry! I just want a fuckin’ cup of coffee! You’re gonna be--

PAGE SIX (Five Panels)

Panel 1. View from the clerk’s POV looking towards the door. Jamie, standing in front of him, is still pointing, but he’s glancing over his shoulder towards the door. Kent is sticking his head in, calling to Jamie.

KENT:
Come on, man, Carlos’s here.

CAPTION:
That clerk was one lucky son of a bitch. I was gonna do it!

Panel 2. View from outside the convenience store. A late 70’s model car, built like a tank and big enough to hold six with room in back is sitting out front. We’re looking towards the store as Jamie walks out to join the guys. Kent and Pauly are outside the car waiting, while Carlos and the other two guys are in the car. Carlos is in the passengers side up front glancing out at Jamie.

JAMIE:
I was gettin’ a cup of coffee, man.

KENT:
Plenty of time for coffee later, Jamie.

CAPTION:
That headache, though, uhhhh… they just didn’t get it.

Panel 3. Guys in the car all talking. Jamie is in the back, crunches between two other guys. View from the back looking forward. Carlos, in the passenger seat, turned back looking at everyone, hand holding a ski mask. Several other ski masks are laying around, too, as well are a couple of pistols, a submachine gun, and an assault rifle.

CARLOS:
You got your parts down?

KENT:
Yeah, how hard can it be? Get in, pull guns, take money.

CARLOS:
Shit like that gets you killed, man. Be serious.

KENT:
I’m serious.

CARLOS:
Whatever.

CAPTION:
Once we got in the car it was all business. We were all mouthy ass-holes, but no fuckin’ around with a gun, you know?

Panel 4. View from the front hood looking in. The guys in the back are pulling on ski masks. Carlos is facing forward, ski mask already on, checking the bolt on his submachine gun. Jamie has his ski mask half way over his head and is mouthing something off.

JAMIE:
And you sure he’s not gonna show?

SFX:
CLICK-CLACK!

CARLOS:
Nah man, I heard on the street Dedicator was after him.

JAMIE:
What kinda stupid name is dedicator? He gonna give ‘im a valentine?

CAPTION:
Ski mask, check, piece, check, pissin’ my pants, check.

Panel 5. Kent looking back at Jamie, smart-assed look on his face.

KENT:
Heard he slit Augustine’s throat last month. I wouldn’t wanna fuck with him.

JAMIE (small):
Still a stupid fuckin’ name.

CAPTION:
No matter what they tell you, don’t believe ‘em. They say those stupid fuckin’ heroes ain’t gonna show up, they’re full of shit.

PAGE SEVEN (Six Panels)

Panel 1. The bank robbers, masks on, guns in hand, bursting into the bank double doors, view from in the bank a little ways. Security, old, frail looking guy is clutching his chest, already starting to pitch over.

CAPTION:
Didn’t even have the first gun pointed an’ the security guard was keelin’ over, heart attack. What kind of security is that?

Panel 2. Closer view of Carlos from the waist up, brandishing his sub-machine gun, dirty look visible barely beneath the ski mask, hard look in his eyes.

CARLOS (yelling):
YOU KNOW THE DRILL, GET ON THE FUCKIN’ GROUND AND DON’T DO NOTHIN’ STUPID!

CAPTION:
Carlos spent eight years upstate for his last heist. What’s the first thing he does when he gets outta the pen? Plans his next, of course!

Panel 3. Guys in ski masks, getting set up, covering different clusters of people. Carlos and Jamie, Jamie holding his pistol, moving towards the front counter.

CAPTION:
Me, I was already countin’ the money. I was gonna go to the store, and get a pack of cigs.

Panel 4. Jamie facing a teller, gun pointed in her face. She has a panicked look on her face, jaw quivering and tears starting to pool on the corners of her eyes. She has a pleading look on her face.

JAMIE:
Come on, girl, they train you for this shit, get with it.

SFX:
BOOOOOOOOMMMM!!!!

CAPTION:
Not that generic shit, either. I was gonna buy the good stuff, red fuckin’ box. I was gonna get a six pack of beer. I could already taste the shit.

Panel 5. View from behind the teller looking towards Jamie. She’s fumbling with the money and he’s glancing the wrong direction over his shoulder. Over the opposite shoulder one of the crooks is getting knocked out of the way by a blue and red blur of motion about 6’6” tall.

SFX:
BOOOOOOOOMMMM!!!!

JAMIE:
Wha?

CAPTION:
And some coffee so black you gotta use a spoon to get it outta the bottom of the cup. Oh God, and that fuckin’ house. I was gonna burn it to the ground.

Panel 6. View from behind Jamie. He’s grabbing a bag from the teller and swinging towards us.

JAMIE:
Gimme that!

CAPTION:
All of those eager thoughts popped outta my head, though, in a blur of red and blue.

PAGE EIGHT (Five Panels)

Panel 1. View from behind Jamie as he looks up into the eyes of Aeronaut in his red and blue costume, looking intimidating and disapprovingly down upon poor Jamie. You can almost see the “gulp” on his face. Aeronaut wears a stereotypical costume of red and blue with an A integrated into the design, chiseled features, and a mask that covers his head and upper face. No cape, however.

JAMIE (small):
Oh…

AERONAUT:
Uh huh.

CAPTION:
I saw this GOD in front of me, honest to god. Never seen one of ‘em so close before. I knew before he did anything I was fuckin’ toast, man.

Panel 2. Aeronaut grabbing the wrist Jamie is using to hold the loot in his hands. Jamie’s face is too shocked to realize he should be screaming in pain.

Panel 3. Aeronaut picking up Jamie quickly into the air by his wrist, the bag dropping to the ground.

Panel 4. Aeronaut swinging Jamie to the ground hard,

SFX:
BOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!

CAPTION:
Somewhere between surprise an’ oblivion I had this thought. Maybe these guys don’t realize we’re not built like them.

Panel 5. Aeronaut pulling Jamie back into the air. It’s obvious several of his bones are already broken and he’s about unconscious. Not easy to tell given how jacked up his face is.

CAPTION:
Then I thought about it again… Maybe they just don’t give a shit.

PAGE NINE (Seven Panels)

Panel 1. Aeronaut chucking Jamie towards the far wall, Jamie’s body limp like its strings were cut.

Panel 2. Jamie smashing into a wall deeper than a human body should be able to, bones and body giving out. It doesn’t kill him, but… he should wish he’s dead.

SFX:
SPLAT!

Panel 3. Black…

CAPTION:
Couldn’t guess how long I was out. Coulda been at the pearly gates for all I knew. Bet they had to shock me. Clear! Clear! Heh heh…

Panel 4. Looking at Jamie in a hospital bed, hooked up to an IV, covered head to toe in bandages, both arms immobilized, one hand’s fingers splayed to keep them separated and healing, attached to wires. One leg is in the air, dangling from a set of wires hanging above the bed. His eyes are closed and the only indication he’s alive is the monitor to his left blipping and showing his stats, a steady pulse.

SFX:
BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!

Panel 5. Close up of Jamie’s face, eyes open, capillary burst in his right eye and bruising visible around the edges. He looks fierce.

CAPTION:
Fuck coffee, I want revenge.

CAPTION:
END